As soon as I walked into my home today and turned on the television, Cubs' centerfielder Corey Patterson was bunting to lead off the second inning of the Cubs game at Colorado. Rockies third baseman, Garrett Atkins fielded the ball and threw it so far down the right field line that Patterson was able to reach third base.
Here we have one of the most opportune scoring situations in baseball: a runner at third base with no one out. It is an opportune situation because there are so many ways to get the runner home from third (especially when he is as fast as Patterson): a medium to deep fly ball, a base hit, a wild pitch, a groundball to anyone but the pitcher, or a squeeze bunt to name a few. Basically anything but a strikeout or an out in the air on the infield will work.
Of course the Cubs did not score in the inning. But with the Cubs the question is not: "Will they score?" (They almost certainly won't.) The proper question is: "How won't they?"
Well, Henry Blanco (which I translate: "Hank White") swings and misses for the first out. With the pitcher, Mark Prior up next, Dusty Baker (signus complicatus) wisely decides to put on the suicide squeeze. Patterson takes off for home with the pitch but Mark Prior--STOP THE PRESSES!--misses the sign and swings away. By sheer luck Prior tips the ball foul saving Patterson from running into the waiting arms of the catcher. The Colorado announcers bark the familiar refrain so often heard by Cubs fans, "Oops, somebody missed a sign there."
What is Baker's sign system? Does it involve some sort of telepathy? Is it actually sign language for the deaf and hard of hearing? Does it involve toothpicks or wristbands? Whatever it is, it must be beyond comprehension. The CIA would have trouble cracking it.
Or maybe the players are just idiots.
Two pitches later Mark Prior hits a routine groundball to second baseman Luis Gonzalez. Patterson takes off for home on contact and would have slid in just ahead of the tag if he had not done something you only see in the movies. Remember in Major League when Wesley Snipes' character, the hapless "Willy Mays Hays", goes into a head first slide only to have his slide end several feet short of the base? That is exactly what Patterson did, only his slide was a feet first pop-up slide that ended up just inside the right-hand batter's box. Rockies' catcher, Danny Ardoin (Ar-dwaaagh...very French-like) actually swung and missed on his initial tag before reaching again to touch the foot of Patterson now standing like a moron 3 feet from homeplate making sure helmet is securely on.
The Cubs went on to win but I don't know how much more of this I can take.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
when Dusty coached SF all I heard about him was that he was one of the greatest managers in the game.
makes me wonder if these announcers ever watched him chew those toothpicks.
Hey Myles. Lady here. I made it. Nice long blog. I didn't read it so I shouldn't comment, but just wanted to tell you I miss you so much already. Love ya! Tell Cher the same.
Post a Comment